ࡱ>  Root Entry`DEST@A5[PerfectOffice_MAIN&0PerfectOffice_OBJECTS,85[85[mucheasier.   Whatactionsofyourshaveallowedthisperception?     Areyoustatingthatanincorrectperceptionismyfault?No.However,evencrazypeoplehave  reasons.Tobehonest,thetypeofactionsthatallowperceptionsoftentelloneagreatdealaboutthepersonwiththeperception. lL Whyhavethoseactionsallowedtheperception? D$   Whatiftheothersideiscrazy?Thisisa 0 goodtimetoexaminethatpossibilityaswellasothers.  Whosharesthisperception?    WhynotaskwhoperceivesmethewayIwanttobeperceived?Thosefewwhohavean   accurateperceptiontellyouagreatdealmoreaboutwhatyouneedtoknowtodealwiththeproblems. p" Whodoesnotsharethisperception? h!H$   Youmeanthosewhoarecausingtheproblem?Notnecessarily.Thosewhodonotseeyou @# & accuratelyincludethosewhoseeyouasyouwanttobeseen.Thisgroupofthosewhodonotshareyourperceptionisnotnecessarilythosewhoopposeyou. &") Whatchanges thatarewithinyourcontrol canbe '$+ madeinthecurrentsituation[thatwillhelptobring (%, aboutachangeinperception]?  Whataboutreality?Peopleactbasedon *'. perception,notreality.Mediationofconflictsusuallyislimitedtoalteringthepatternsofactionbetweenpeople.Thechangeswithinyourcontrolare d-D*1 yourunilateralalternativestonegotiationandsettlementandarethethingsyoucando.  Atthistimeyoumayalsowishtodefineandconsideryoursinglebestalternativetochangingperceptionbyunilateralacts.Donotlistallthealternatives[i.e.stayinplaceandbeuWPC: 0$cAŇ^-ؕ߇BA5vͧ); ` W#Xb>y. >8R[#'=DVîwR(VM;dz$ Eѭ4 * Bbw'a5;-+OZx,ri$Ph)iԔ-<{^` XnfH!gq=|Y4uga 1h!{(@wo28с7AX/du.떟W\F@SuI[1AXҚ+3X:wx9 Z6Times New Roman RegularX($# e37=CIQYag1.a.i.(1)(a)(i)1)a) 4b5E67U8E9E;<=D>"U  !  ݛX4X4  C  $# C8Xdd8 5MEDIATOR'SCHECKLISTFORPERSONALITYFACTOREDCONFLICTS  X 4XX4  Postthisandhaveeachpartyfilloutandreviewpriortomediationsessionsonconflict.6(XX%X%(66(XX%X%(6Howareyouperceived[bythoseyouareatodds x  with]?Providethreedescriptionsoftheirperception.a)__________________________________b)__________________________________c)__________________________________Whatactionsofyourshaveallowedthis    perception[regardlessofwhetherornotyour  `  actionsshouldhaveallowedtheperception,what  (  actionshaveallowedtheperception]?a)__________________________________77b)__________________________________c)__________________________________d)__________________________________Whyhavethoseactionsallowedtheperception  [whyhastheotherpartydrawntheconclusionstheyhave--providethereasonsyouhave]?a)__________________________________b)__________________________________c)__________________________________Howdoyouwanttobeperceived? p a)__________________________________b)__________________________________c)__________________________________Whatisatruthfulperceptionofyou? X  a)__________________________________b)__________________________________c)__________________________________Whosharesthisperception?[nameindividualsor @% groups].a)__________________________________b)__________________________________c)__________________________________Whodoesnotsharethisperception?[nameat #!+ leastoneindividualandatleastonegroup].a)__________________________________b)__________________________________c)__________________________________55Whatchanges thatarewithinyourcontrol can h)'2 bemadeinthecurrentsituation[thatwillhelpto 0*'3 bringaboutachangeinperception]?a)__________________________________b)__________________________________c)__________________________________ P-*7 Ѐ X7 Whyareyouwilling,ornotwilling,toeffectthosechanges? @9 a)__________________________________b)__________________________________c)__________________________________Whatarethechangesthatyoufeeltheinstitution ( > shouldmake?  ? a)__________________________________b)__________________________________88c)__________________________________9_9Whataretheinstitution'slimits[i.e.whatcan  D reasonablybeexpectedofanimperfectinstitutioninanimperfectworld]?a)__________________________________b)__________________________________c)__________________________________Ifyoumadechangesinyouractionsand/or PK processes,whatreciprocitydoyouthinkisfaironbehalfoftheinstitutionandonbehalfofthoseinconflictwithyou? PN Institutiona)__________________________________b)__________________________________c)__________________________________Othersa)__________________________________b)__________________________________c)__________________________________  Afteryouhaveansweredalloftheabovequestions,pleaseanswerthefollowingquestions:  1. ` Whatdoyouseetheasthereal (# ^ problem? #!_   2. ` Whatdoyouseeasyourrealgoal? %(#a   3. ` Whatdoyouseeastheavailable '$c realisticsolutionsthatwillachieveyourgoalandsolvetheproblem? (H&e   Writeyouranswersonaseparatesheetinlongform.Thelasttwoshouldbeyourmediationgoals.  ,0*j ;1XXXXXX1;ֹ X XX(#@tt P  MEDIATOR'SCHECKLISTFOR  PERSONALITYFACTOREDCONFLICTS     <Theseare<=A=>a>nswerstocommonlyaskedquestions.Makethisavailabletoallindividualswhoarefillingoutchecklistsheets.Howareyouperceived? 4     Whatiftheperceptioniswrong?Iassume   thatmostoftheperceptionsarewrong.Iftheperceptionsarecorrect,thingsarenhappy,changejobs,gobacktoschool,backpackacrossAlaska,etc.],justthesinglebestalternative.  `9 Whyareyouwilling,ornotwilling,toeffectthose X 8 ; changes? D $ <   Whyanswerthisquestion?Thistellsyou 0 = howmuchyoureallycareaboutthechanges.  > Whatarethechangesthatyoufeeltheinstitution  @ shouldmake? A   Whythisquestion?Thisdefineswhatyou B thinkyouwantfromthe"outside"party.Mostpeoplewantanimposedsolution.Thisasksyoutodefinewhatsolutionyouwantimposedandhow,bywhichchanges,youwantthesolutionimposed. |\F ЀWhataretheinstitution'slimits[i.e.whatcan hHG reasonablybeexpectedofanimperfectinstitutioninanimperfectworld]?  Whyshouldthismatter?Manyconflicts , J happenbecausepeopleexpectinstitutionstoactoutsideoftheirnatureorability--muchlikeexpectingastategovernmentalagencytochangeafederalpolicy.Itcan'tandwon'tbedonewithoutfirsthavingthefederalpolicydelegatedtothestate.[TexasisoutsideoftheEPAformostmattersbecauseithadthosemattersdelegatedtostateagencies.Attemptstogetstateactionwerefutilebeforethathappened]. x"XS Ifyoumadechangesinyouractionsand/orprocess P$0!U es,whatreciprocitydoyouthinkisfaironbehalfoftheinstitutionandonbehalfofthoseinconflictwithyou? '#X   WhydoIneedtochange?Youdon't. ($Y However,inmostsituations,aquidproquoisexpected.Thenaturaltrade-offdemandedinmosthumanaffairsiswhy"newwineinoldbottles"isoftensuchafailure--intheshortrun. ,|)^   AtthistimeyoualsoneedtoaskyourselfifwhatyouwantisvaluableenoughtotakealongtermapproachandtoseektriumphthroughgradualismmuchliketheFabianSocialists.  @00P ****************  2.  Whatdoyouseeasyourrealgoal?  t   Don'tyoumean,"whatpositionsamIsupporting?"No.Theabovestepshelptodefinethe X 8  toolsandtheprobleminwaysnecessarytomediation.Thisquestioncomesbacktoanissueyoushouldhavethoughtagreatdealaboutandshouldhavesomefirmideasconcerning.  Apartyshouldprepareaonepageoutlineofthegoaltheywanttoachieve.Youneedtoknowanddefineyourinterestsandgoalsratherthantorehashthepositionsyouhavetaken.Positionsrarelyhaveanyfirmconnectionwithrealityorgoals. |\   3.  Whatdoyouseeastheavailable T4 realisticsolutionsthatwillachieveyourgoalandsolvetheproblem ,    Isthiswheremypositionsgo?No.Ifyou  weredealinginpositions,thiswouldbewhereyououtline,inapageortwo,howyouintendtoreachyourpositions.Ratherthanlookatpositions,thisiswhereyoutaketimetowriteaoneortwopageoutlineofhowtorealisticallyachieveyourgoalsinastepbystepfashion.Yourgoalinmediationornegotiationshouldbetorealisticallymovetowardsaproblemsolvingstepratherthantomakeafutileattempttoimposeadirectendresult.